I never anticipated that I’d be the type of person to marry at a young age.
And if that sounds judgmental and presumptuous, you’re absolutely right. I used to hold strong opinions about college-aged individuals wearing engagement rings or making lifelong commitments before their 25th birthdays. My exact sentiment probably involved a dismissive “Pssssshh” and an eye roll.
In this day and age, this perspective is fairly common. While it was once considered the norm for young women to settle down and marry shortly after high school (a practice still prevalent in some subcultures), mainstream society has undergone a significant shift.
Young brides are often subject to stereotypes that label them as old-fashioned, anti-feminist, deeply religious, inexperienced, and destined for divorce – frequently, all of the above. This new societal narrative is pervasive, from hushed gossip to television plotlines. A “smart and educated young lady” is presumed to know better. However, as life unfolded, I willingly signed a marriage certificate in 2008, even with an eight-month pregnancy adding to the mix. I was a 22-year-old bride.
Six years down the road, I’ve not only seen a shift in my perspective but also significant personal growth, largely attributed to my marriage. While marriage has its challenges, marrying young has presented us with unique obstacles and some lesser-known advantages.
Here are 10 significant benefits of marrying at a young age:
Growing Up Together: My husband may be 30 years old now, but I remember him as an 18-year-old, just out of high school, delivering pizzas and sharing apartments with roommates. We’ve journeyed through college, internships, relocations, graying hair, and changing bodies together. Witnessing each other’s personal and professional growth has been rewarding.
Less Baggage: While we both have pasts, our adult intimacy, including shared apartments, pets, and travel experiences, has only been with each other. I didn’t spend my adult life with someone else, as I was off the market by the age of 20. All our baggage is checked together.
Ease of Combining Lives: Merging our lives was relatively smooth. We didn’t have entrenched adult habits, routines, and patterns to upend. We built our life’s foundation together, which eliminated complexities and adjustments.
Early Life Lessons: Marrying at the beginning of adulthood exposed me to the realities of relationships, erasing fantasies of fairy-tale endings. Marriage taught me valuable lessons in sacrifice, commitment, compromise, and unconditional love. These real-world experiences have helped us mature and develop a more profound understanding of faith, endurance, forgiveness, and patience.
Budget-Friendly Wedding: Our wedding was a modest affair, costing less than $100. Our minimalistic approach was not only acceptable but also appreciated.
Realistic Expectations: We didn’t wait for the “perfect” moment or an ideal partner. Instead, we embraced love as it came, free from the weight of unrealistic expectations.
Shared Milestones: Every milestone and achievement, from humble beginnings to a comfortable adult life, has been celebrated together. The camaraderie in our journey adds to our bond.
Memories of Youth: Having first-person memories of our passionate, youthful romance at 19 years old is a treasure I’ll cherish as I grow older.
Happiness in Youthful Marriage: Studies show that married individuals in their 20s, particularly between 24 and 26, report higher levels of satisfaction and happiness. Young couples, specifically those aged 22 to 25, have a greater likelihood of maintaining a successful marriage.
Time to Grow: Whether our marriage evolves or takes a different path, we have time on our side. Our shared growth and lessons learned will shape our future, and we’ll carry the wisdom gained from our young marriage with us.
Ultimately, time is the most valuable asset we possess, and our young marriage has granted us the gift of experiencing it together.