On the day I reached the milestone age of 40, I was taken aback by the fact that I was still single. How had I arrived at this significant birthday without a partner by my side? I couldn’t help but feel a sense of devastation as I grappled with the idea of marriage at 40 and pondered how I had ended up in this situation.
It was at this point that I made a firm commitment to actively seek out love. After some deep introspection, I resolved to do whatever it took to meet a multitude of potential partners.
My goal was clear: I wanted to encounter a wonderful man with a good heart, someone who was kind, fun-loving, attractive, employed, and most importantly, someone who could embrace my spiritual beliefs about life. Finding a soulmate, a partner to share my life with, was my ultimate aim.
Over the course of 15 months, I went on dates with 30 different men. And then, I found Paul—the man I would eventually marry. Even as I write this, a smile creeps across my face because we’ve just celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary. My husband, Paul, remains as endearing as ever, and he continues to bring laughter into my life.
Interestingly, it wasn’t immediately obvious that Paul was the right match for me. We were strikingly different in terms of our backgrounds, family backgrounds, religions, and careers.
Here are seven telltale signs that convinced me I had discovered my soulmate:
After our first date, he walked me to my car and asked to see me again. He kissed me on the cheek and, before heading back to his car, he turned around and inquired about my availability. My heart melted at this genuine desire to spend more time together.
The cosmos seemed to bless our relationship. On our third date, as we sat on a bench by the beach, Paul kissed me beneath the moonlight, and we witnessed a shooting star illuminate the night sky. It was as if something cosmic and romantic was unfolding before us.
On our fourth date, he arrived an hour late but with good reason. He handed me a bouquet of flowers and explained that he had stopped to help a woman with three small grandchildren whose car had broken down. This act of kindness illuminated his good heart.
Despite our differences, spending time with him felt remarkably different from my usual high-energy, fast-paced life. Our connection was peaceful and comforting, a departure from the usual excitement or intellectual conversations with other men. It felt right and easy.
He respected my spiritual beliefs, even if they differed from his own. Our shared reverence for nature and the cosmos became evident during our time together.
I could be my silly and vulnerable self around him. We once laughed heartily about a dream I had involving Paul Newman, and he quickly caught on to the pun, making us both laugh.
My subconscious felt secure with him. In a dream, I saw us as a Celtic spiritual woman and a warrior considering marriage. I asked him if he would protect me, and his firm response was, “Yes, I will.”
Determining whether someone is your soulmate is a deeply personal journey. Based on my experience and my role as a dating coach for women, compatibility and mutual respect are the cornerstones of a lasting partnership. These seven soulmate checkpoints guided me to recognize Paul as the right man for me. Take the time to discern what matters most to you, and let it serve as your own guide on the path to finding your soulmate.